Friday, November 19, 2010

Top 5 Movies That Deserve A Remake

With the current trend in Hollywood to remake and rape every film that has ever touched celluloid, I thought I would compile a list of movies that I would like to see remade. The biggest obstacle will be keeping Michael Bay away from them.

5) Friday the 13th

Yeah, I know it has already been remade. It was fucking horrible. I've seen it twice and I still couldn't tell you what happens. How do you make a giant sadistic killer in a hockey mask boring? With Jared Padalecki in the cast it seems like the worst episode of Supernatural ever produced. I kept waiting for Dean to run over Jason with the Impala.

4) Big Trouble in Little China

You know what Jack Burton says at a time like this? A personal favorite from my childhood. I want to see a remake with better special effects and an expanded story, maybe see a flash back of Lo Pan being turned into a demon and an explanation of what that big ass creature that comes out of the hole is.

3) The Big Sleep

The reason I want to see a remake for this is simple; there haven't been any great noir films made in years and I don't trust anybody to write an original one. Remaking a Bogart classic seems like a better choice. The Big Sleep is lesser known than the Maltese Falcon so a retelling would be met with less resistance.

2) The Great Escape

I would love to see a remake of this. It does present an interesting quagmire though. Do you remain faithful to the historical events or do you go with the Steve McQueen's a badass motorcycle jump version. Either way would be good with me. Just keep Quentin Tarantino away from it. We don't need Inglourious Basterds 2.

1) The Godfather

Let me preface this by saying the original is one of my all time favorite movies. The only reason I want to see a remake is to see some of the subplots from the book that were dropped, such as the Johnny Fontane and Lucy Mancini sections.

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  1. You know what Jack Burton says at a time like this? A personal favorite from my childhood.

  2. Mine too. I watched it for the first time in about 10 years the other day and I still love it.